Talk, Be Honest, And Never Keep Things From Your Spouse

“Most people would agree that being authentic and transparent interactions with one’s intimate partner is essential to a successful long-term relationship,” according to Randi Gunther Ph.D. While browsing through Facebook, I saw a short note with an image of a young man and a woman almost kissing each other.


If Your Man Loves You

If your man loves you, he will always want to communicate with you and talk to you. It can be through text message or a phone call.


If your man loves you, he will always think of you every time he wakes up in the morning and before he goes to sleep at night.


If your man loves you, he will ask what’s happening with you and would want to know how your day is. This act is not to control your movements. He just wants to have that “I belong in your world too” feeling. Your man wants to know how you are at this time and wants to be involved.


If your man loves you, he will always find the time for you no matter how hectic his schedule is. Even if he is busy, if you call or if you need him, he will prioritize you.


These words hit me like a bucket of ice. Are these true? Does it mean that if my man fails to do these to me, he doesn’t love me?


My Husband Says These Words To Me And I Hate It


“I’m so swamped right now, Bee, you just don’t know how busy I am.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Bee. I forgot to call you last night. I was so tired, and I slept shortly after I stepped in.”

“Bee, can I call you later? I’m doing something right now.”


And he forgets to call me later.


What do these mean? Could it be that my husband of fifteen years is not in love with me anymore? That feeling of being insecure festered in my mind and heart to the point that I was intentionally making fights with him just so to get attention.


What was I doing? I’m not sixteen anymore, and I feel like I’m acting irrationally. Is there a basis for what I’m going through right now? Is my husband really ignoring me? Is he really neglecting me? He works far away, and yes, our only means of communication are social apps like Facebook and Viber. Is it fair of me to think that he doesn’t care because of the stupid Facebook note that I came across a few weeks ago?


And so, to cap off my craziness, I sent a screenshot of the note to him, and I slept. When I woke up, I had a notification, and when I opened it, he had a message for me.

“Being honest and emotionally vulnerable in a romantic relationship is a form of both personal and relationship integrity,” says Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S.


His Real Feelings For Me


“Bee, I know you think that I don’t love you anymore. But that is so far from the truth. Why am I here on this island? We talked about this, and our plan was for me to finish this contract because the money we’re getting here can open up our daycare center. It’s your dream which means, it’s my hope for you to fulfill your dream and I’d like to help. Three more months, bee, ninety days more, and we’d be together. And we can build what we want from thereon, together. I love you so much even if you don’t feel it.”


So, was I crazy? The negative mind can corrupt a person in a snap. I was making up scenarios in my head on how he wants to leave me because of that stupid note. But all he wants is for me to be happy; for me to achieve my dream. My husband is so selfless while I am his crazy wife.


“Words are powerful weapons and once they are said they cannot be taken back,” Michelle Fraley, MA, WPCC, psychologist, relationship expert, and professional matchmaker, says. I guess, before jumping to conclusions, say what you want to say to your wife or husband. Don’t hide behind quotes, and never keep things from your spouse. An issue can clear up instantly when the two of you talk about it instead of creating drama and going in crazy mode – like me!


If your man loves you, he will tell you flat out I LOVE YOU. You’ll know in your heart if it’s true or not.